Thursday, January 26, 2012

10 Reasons Why I Almost Quit Blogging

A little while back I found myself considering whether or not I wanted to continue being a children's activity blogger.  I've been at it for over four years now, and while it can be so so fun I have recently been visited by vague feelings of uncertainty about its value to me and my family.

Since it is difficult to know what to do with vague feelings I decided to spend about a`week reflecting on the pros and cons. The list I am sharing today is what I perceive to be the negative side of children's activity blogging.  I would love to hear  helpful hints on how other mommy bloggers counteract these aspects as well as thoughts about down sides that I may not have mentioned.

1.  Too much time on the computer.  There's, of course, the actual writing of the posts, but then once I'm there in front of the computer, it's easy to be tempted by all the other things (Facebook, Pinterest, etc.)  The internet can be so addicting!  If the development of self control is something I care about in my children it seems like I should at least model it. 

2.  Sometimes it is hard to be fully present in the activities I do with my children because I am distracted by trying to take good pictures.

3. Gravitation toward activities that blog well.  It's easy to want to pick activities that are photogenic, unique, and clever.  Those are not always the activities that happen to be best for my children.

4.  Temptation to only do an activity one time.  After all, you can really only blog about it once.  This happens despite my conviction that children often get the most benefit out of something once it becomes familiar and is deepened by repetition.

5.  Fun activities sometimes win over things like laundry.  Sometimes that's ok, but "more fun" is not always what my family needs.  They also need clean socks.

6.  Watching the comments, number of followers, and page hits on my blog sometimes turns my focus away from seeking the Lord's approval first and foremost.

7.  I'm finding that running an activity blog has meant that the time I spend with my children is sometimes over-structured. My intuition tells me that while there is a place for structured activities children also need parents to spend much child-directed time with them.  There need to be long stretches when the parent has the leisure to listen, thoughtfully observe, and to play in a carefree way.  Sometimes because of the blog I get impatient with this kind of thing and want to be accomplishing a goal- finishing an activity so I can write about it.

8.  There is a temptation to not allow an activity to evolve organically (related to number seven).  I usually have a goal in mind for the direction I want an activity to go, and I can sometimes bulldoze other ideas so that I can make sure it will happen "the right way."

For example, one day I noticed that there were several books open and turned upside down on the table.  I thought it would be cute for M to find her dollhouse dolls and put them under the open books and pretend that they were camping in tents. It looked very cute that way, and I was about to snap a picture and write a quick post on it, when M decided to flatten all the books and swirl them around the table to pretend they were boats (very not blog-worthy).  There was a part of me that didn't want to let her do that.

9.  Sometimes I fear that our steady stream of new activities will condition my children to not appreciate simple, classic pleasures. I don't want them to become dependent on novelty.

10.  I worry sometimes that readers of this blog might get the mistaken impression that I think that being a good mother is directly related to how many creative activities one does with one's children.  Motherhood is of course so much deeper than such an external thing.  I am especially concerned that I not give off that impression because I think that our culture is overemphasizes the external.  I would not like to contribute to that unhealthy imbalance.

At the end of my week of reflection I did decide to keep blogging for the time being.  I'll try to find a time next week to share what I feel are some of the positive aspects of blogging that for me make it worth it despite all of the potential pitfalls.



16 comments:

Amanda said...

You have perfectly voiced some of my own qualms about blogging.  At least once a week I ponder one or more of the same points you listed here.  I started my blog as a way of sharing what I thought were great, unique ideas for playing with my children only to delve deeper into the blogging world and discover I'm not so original after all.  I wonder, "If I'm not so original, why keep taking the time to blog?".  I suppose I still like to share ideas, but I constantly have to remind myself that spending time with my children is my first priority... not the great photo or the perfect activity execution or dreaming up something grand and wonderful to blog about. 
Thank you for writing this - I think I will need to come back and re-read it from time to time.  

Laura said...

What about just cutting the frequency of your blog posts?  Say, maybe, one a week.  That way you spend less time working on the blog and you get more time and opportunities to enjoy your kids in a non-structured way.

Heidi said...

Wow.  Well said.  I struggle with the same things.  I wish I were wired differently and could just post a little bit, every now and then.  I especially struggle with being present.  While my children are enjoying an activity, I am almost always narrating in my mind.  I wish I could turn it off.

Katey said...

I identify with the internal narration.  

Katey said...

The question of originality is one that has troubled me at times too.  In the end, though, I've decided that the presentation of the ideas is important too, and no one executes the ideas or presents them in exactly the same way.  I've increasingly thought of blogging as an art form more than a bare shell for conveying information.  

Katey said...

The question of originality is one that has troubled me at times too.  In the end, though, I've decided that the presentation of the ideas is important too, and no one executes the ideas or presents them in exactly the same way.  I've increasingly thought of blogging as an art form more than a bare shell for conveying information.  

Allison said...

Very well written.  I'm new to the blogging world, and I've already seen much of what you wrote. The whole reason I started blogging was to journal the fun things I do with my boys, and I don't want to lose sight of that.  Thank you for this reminder.  :)

Allison said...

I've come to the same realization, Amanda!  I thought I had a ton of original ideas only to find that most everything has been done already.  Still, it hasn't been done with my kids, so I decided not to let that bother me.  I started blogging to journal what we are doing more than to share with others, so in my case it doesn't affect whether I blog or not.

The Learning Basket said...

Wonderful post! I've been bothered by some of your points at one time or another, but like the others who wrote their comments, I started blogging to document what we are doing... and to be honest, to please myself as I like to write. :) 

Early on, I decided that I did not want to take a lot of pictures as I noticed that it bothered my daughter's engagement in whatever we are doing.

Anyway, I really enjoy your blog and I hope that you can find your happy place. :)

The Learning Basket said...

Wonderful post! I've been bothered by some of your points at one time or another, but like the others who wrote their comments, I started blogging to document what we are doing... and to be honest, to please myself as I like to write. :) 

Early on, I decided that I did not want to take a lot of pictures as I noticed that it bothered my daughter's engagement in whatever we are doing.

Anyway, I really enjoy your blog and I hope that you can find your happy place. :)

Laura H said...

I'm am glad (for now) that you will continue to blog. I have enjoyed your blog for a while and have gotten some great ideas from you.

Katey@ Having Fun at Home said...

Thank you, Laura.  That is encouraging!

Heather said...

I am right here with you.  Struggling, pondering, debating internally about the pros & cons.  I am off to see if you wrote that 2nd post you mentioned... I think our minds are in the same place right now!
~Heather

Katey (Having Fun at Home) said...

Hi Heather.  I haven't written it yet.  Still pondering (like you).  :-)  I'd love to read your thoughts if you write a post on this line.  

Carol said...

Yes, I hear you. I think about these things too. Thanks for sharing. 

Why Amy Smiles said...

Wow, thank you so much for your honesty and transparency in writing this post. I'm seeing it a little late :/ but you have put into print many of the things I've struggled with in my own blogging experience. I am constantly reminding myself to *be there* with my family instead of *planning* my next post and orchestrating our family time accordingly.  Thanks for encouraging us to question ourselves, so we can all be better moms.